Sorry to be slow to get a new post up!

Since Oct. 11th, Dad's fallen twice and done some risky things like trying to get out of bed on the wrong side of the bed. Blessedly, he hasn't been seriously injured in his falls. But we're going to try bed rails on his current bed. If the bed rails don't work on his current bed, we'll get a standard hospital bed from the hospice company. We're hoping the bed rails make it harder for him to get up without us being aware of it--the cause of one of the falls--make it harder for him to try getting out on the wrong side of the bed--a fall risk we want to stop from happening--and make it impossible for him to roll out of bed--the cause of the other fall.

Dad's mental capacities are weakening, but they go up and down rather than staying the same. I was told when I got home from my vacation in Pennsylvania that Dad had missed me, but when I looked in to tell him I was back from being gone, he said, "Gone?" I assumed from that response that he hadn't really been aware that I'd been away, and that someone had probably asked him if he missed me, and he'd said yes.

But last night, Janie, who works for us several nights a week, told me he'd said to her, "Where's Alison? I miss her." To me, his awareness/lack of awareness in this example indicates his mental state in general.

While I was away and because of Dad falling, my sister Christie decided try giving Dad solid foods again--we'd stopped because of persistent digestion problems. He's enjoying the food, his digestion is better than it's been for some time--and he's putting on weight!

While I was gone, Dad enjoyed a letter and pictures from the Orams, our dear friends in England. Last Sunday, he enjoyed a short visit from his nephew Laurie (Skip) Craig and Laurie's son Stephen--Stephen Marshall, actually.

We've appreciated the people in our Mormon ward (our congregation) who have come to help out with Dad recently, so I can get out to run an errand or to go visiting teaching (the women in each Mormon ward--each congregation--are assigned to visit other women on a monthly basis). Christie also called on neighbors (and ward members) to help get Dad up when he fell. When I thanked a ward member for coming to help, he told me it was an honor--he, along with many others in the ward, dearly love Dad.

In case you want to hear about my vacation, it was wonderful. Christine and Michael are enjoying living in State College, Pennsylvania. Michael's started school at Penn State, Christine's finishing her master's thesis, and Jeffrey is delighting everyone who meets him! (I be happy to describe my visit in much greater detail to anyone who's willing to listen.) I also got to visit a bit with Christie, her husband Duane, and their son Jonathan.

Thanks for reading--more on Sunday!

Week of Oct. 5-Oct. 11

Dad's declined mentally this past week, which has been hard to witness, but even in this decline Dad's loving nature and good humor shines through.



To understand this first story, you need a little background information: I'd told Dad earlier in the week that Christie was coming for a visit--my sister who lives in Pittsburgh--and I'd gotten a long-overdue haircut, making my hair look more like Christie's.



On Friday, after not seeing Dad for perhaps 24 hours at the most, I peeked in on him to say hi. He'd been asleep, but woke up and said, "Oh, I'm so glad to see you! You look wonderful!" He held out his arms for me to come give him a hug and a kiss. He obviously thought I was Christie!



I felt sad that he was losing the ability to tell his children apart, but I thought how wonderful it was to have a father whose response to one of his children was to be so happy to see them that he wanted to hug and kiss them!



Dad also didn't realize who I was when I had to speak to him on the phone this week. But again, he spoke to me graciously and sweetly.



Let me hasten to add that since that time, Dad's known who I was.



Here's Dad's joke of the week: on Tues., Dad was given some medication that made him hallucinate. He was agitated and telling me that he had some "concern about the Rasmuss boys"--did he mean the Rasmussen boys, a family that moved from our ward some years ago? It wasn't clear. I stroked his hair back from his forehead and said, "I think you're a little confused." He grinned at me, clearly lucid, and said, "Just a little confused?"--he can even find humor in a hallucination.



That's all for last week. I'm headed to Penn State this week to visit my daughter, son-in-law, and grandson, so there may not be a post next Sunday.



I've appreciated hearing from many of you that you're enjoying this blog. We are grateful for your interest, for your love and concern.

Dad's week, Oct. 4

Well, it's been another quiet week for Dad.

There are little indications that he's declining--I've found I need to give instructions to Dad one at a time. One day he didn't remember the routine with the hand sanitizer--even when I told him what we were doing.

On the other hand, the other day I accidentally squirted some hand sanitizer on his leg, apologized, and he wiped at it, saying, "leg sanitizer" and chuckled!

Today he and I listened to some of General Conference (the Mormon Church's semi-annual world conference). We both enjoyed Elder Jeffrey Holland's talk--he was Dad's beloved student and later his boss. (Ask any family member to tell you the story of Dad telling his Chinese students--who'd been taught about how awful American bosses were--that his boss would give him a hug. But you may have heard it yourself. It's one of his favorite stories!)

Dad told me this week that he was "hanging on"; I suggested that maybe he could let go. It sounded like he doesn't know how to do that. I'm praying he can learn.

Alison