Update on Dad 3-28-10

Hi, Everybody,

I have some first-hand news this week because my brother John phoned me when he and his wife, Elaine, and their daughter Marie were visiting Dad this last week.

I was able to tell Dad about a sister missionary I met at the Washington DC Temple visitors' center. She's from Shanghai. Her parents came to the US fourteen years ago for her father to do some postdoctoral research. They encountered the Church, were baptized, and a year later were sealed in the Washington DC temple. Then they returned to China where they've lived the gospel without being able to meet with any other members for twelve years. Two years ago the Chinese government started allowing Chinese Church members to meet for Sunday services. The missionary says she feels she's in her second home being at the DC temple.

Of course, it's hard to know just how much Dad took in of what I said, but I was so excited to tell him because he's been so interested in the progress of the Church in China since he and Mom spent three years there.

Dad sounded interested and responsive--to that story and to another about Jeffrey, my grandson. (I can't remember now which story I told him--there are so many to choose from!)

John told me later that Dad was alert and responsive with him, Elaine and Marie also. His hospice nurse, Barbara, told me that he'd told her one of his stories (one that I've told her is one of his standards), but it's one she hasn't heard in a long time--I think since before he went to the care facility.

Barbara also had some good news/bad news to tell me. Because Dad's been doing so well, he's being taken off hospice. He has lost some weight and his upper arm circumference has gone down, but otherwise, he's stable and doing well.

This change means he'll no longer have his wonderful aide, Cris, who has come in to bathe and dress him five days a week. She knows him so well and is so loving to him! Now the aides at the care facility will bathe and dress him. I'm sure they will be kind and caring, but we'll miss having Cris to watch over him.

Being taken off hospice also means that Dad will no longer have his wonderful hospice nurse, Barbara, who checked on him weekly. We have so much appreciated her meticulous care of Dad! Now nurses at the facility will be in charge of his care.

The change won't mean much difference financially--it will mean that Dad will again be paying co-pays on his medicines, but his insurance will pay for most of the cost, and he's already paying for the care facility, so there won't be a change there. Martha informed me some weeks ago that Dad money is able to cover his expenses, so we don't have to worry about that.

It looks like Dad will be around longer than any of us expected! Thanks to all of you who read about Dad--and to all who let me know you're reading. I hope you all have a blessed and lovely Easter.

Reports from Christie and Bob on Dad

Hi, Everybody,

I've received reports from Christie and from Bob on Dad, so I'll include them here.

Christie visited in early February. Here's her report on her visits with Dad:

"I saw Dad almost every day while I was in Utah. He seemed very pleased that I was there. I think he knew who I was at least most of the time. Some of our visits were pretty short because he was tired and did not want to talk, but we had one visit where he asked about the kids and seemed interested in hearing about them. One visit was at dinner time. Dad was in the diningroom, and one of the staff members was helping him eat. She let me take over the task and Dad ate all of his dinner, with me feeding him. He then ate his dessert--pumpkin pie, all by himself.

"I was impressed with the staff members that I met. They were all very kind and not condescending to the patients."

Here's Bob's information on Dad from March 1:

"Papa is always happy to see me. He still calls me by name and is warm and loving to me every time I visit. In addition, he is always full of appreciation for my visits. I feel he is some what lonely, bored, and trapped in a time in life that I am not looking forward to myself.

"He often struggles to complete his thoughts and as always he appreciates my patience and willingness to wait for him to complete his thoughts the best he can. He enjoys seeing photos of family and listening to stories about what they are doing. Although I feel he is frustrated when he is put in a situation where he has to sort out who belongs to who and where everyone fits together. I wonder if that is why he is not as interested in trying to talk to family on the phone -
I feel like it is just so hard for him to put it all together.

"One thing that always helps me be reconciled with having Papa Daddy live at the care center is the obvious love that everyone there has for him. I can tell they do love him because they have picked up on the little personality traits of Dad from their conversation with him - they can mimic back to you the way he laughs and the way he says things - the gestures. I am comforted by knowing they have taken the time to enjoy him.

"I try to visit with Dad at least twice a week - I truly wish I could do more - I feel like I should try to do more. Last week I went over to visit with Dad for Lucy one evening but Papa was sleeping so soundly that he did not wake-up while I was there even though I was there for over a half hour. That is the only visit with him that I have had that he did not awaken when I touched his arm and hands. I decided he needed the sleep more than the conversation.

"The family needs to know that the staff at the care center are so impressed with us as a family. They said that we are the most dedicated family they know - it is so impressive to them that we have family who live so far away who spend the time and expense to travel and visit as consistently as we do as a family. I too am impressed and I am so thankful for all of the family and feel lucky to be a part of this wonderful family."

Now just a little postscript from Alison: Dad's wonderful nurse, Barbara, had Dad checked after he finished his antibiotic for his urinary tract infection--he still had an infection, so he's now on another antibiotic. I'm so grateful for her care and attention to detail!

Thanks to all who care about Dad and read this blog. And I love to hear from you, so I know you're out there! I'll be posting again in two weeks.