How Dad's doing at the care center

I've had the flu, so I saw Dad on Dec. 8 and then didn't see him again until today, Dec. 20. So I've culled some of this post from what the nurse and others have said about Dad and from a long email from Lucy's husband, Bob Nickelson.

First from me and reports from nurses:

Dad is the star of the care center, loved by everyone. Dad's aide in the daytime told Martha that she loved to hear his stories(!) On Tuesday night when I was there for the Christmas party, the aide came by with her little granddaughter to have Dad meet her.

The head nurse told me that she'd asked Dad how long he and Mom were married, and he thought for a long time, closed his eyes for awhile, and then said to the nurse that when he saw her again, Mom would get after him for not remembering how long they'd been married! Both stories are surprising to me because at home he hasn't been that responsive for a long time. I'm also pleased, but not surprised, that the workers at the facility have taken Dad to their hearts. One aide told me, "Marshall and I have a lot to talk about because we're both from the South."

Here's Bob's report on his visit to Dad on Dec. 9:

I went over and visited with Dad last Wednesday evening from a little after 4pm till about 6:30 pm . He had removed his O2 and it was on the floor but the machine was still running. I visited with him about the fact that if he decided not to wear his O2 that he would become very sick as a result - I then asked him if he wanted me to help him put it back on - he thought about it for a while and then said yes.

Next, Dad and I looked at some photos I took of Christmas lights - he commented on the colors and the people in some of the other photos - for example I showed him the photo I took of Louise [Lucy] and the rain barrel she and I constructed - he said something about it being a good idea. I also showed him two of the videos I took of the concert [Martha's Christmas Chorus that Lucy and her daughter Kari sing in, also Elaine--John's wife, their daughter Lisa, and Katy and Emily, Martha's daughters] - he was able to pick out Martha and Louise - he also commented on how good the video sounded.

Then a small group of primary children came in and sang Christmas music for him and gave him two Christmas ornaments - he thanked them and wished them a Merry Christmas.

I asked if he wanted to try calling and talking to family members using my cell phone and he did want to - so I tried calling Alan first without success and then Christie without success and then we called and talked to John and Lisa - the phone visit seemed like a success - he wished Lisa the best on her last day of classes (at BYU) and told her to hang in there - then Lisa said something about coming to visit after she finished the semester and Dad's response was, "Well I am not sure about visiting - you will need to talk to Ruth about scheduling such a visit."

I think it was interesting that he was with it enough to wish Lisa well with the rest of the semester but then slipped out of reality when Lisa asked about her visiting - that was the only slipping out of reality that happened during the whole time I was there at least as far as I could tell.

Then it was time to eat dinner - he drank all of the liquids served but only ate a bite or two of each of the different solid foods (with me encouraging him to try a little of everything) he did comment to the nurse how dark the bottom of the cookie was twice but he ate most of it anyway.

He called me by name several times and was very happy to see me. He did comment on how itchy he was but he put his hands on top of the blankets as a sign that he was trying hard not to scratch himself - the only complaints he had while I was there was that his back was hurting him and that it was noisy. I think that it was the pain in his back that really prevented him from eating more of his dinner - it just got to a point where he needed to lie back in bed so his back would stop hurting.

When I asked him what he thought about the food being served at the center - his reply was "uh" lifting both hands and arms up - the only thing he seemed really interested in eating was the cookie and he also seemed to like the milk even though it was thick enough you could tip the glass over and the milk and the spoon both remained in the glass. As I was leaving, he wished me well and said he loved me too.

He took his pills just fine and responded well to the nurse and the CNA. All in all it was a good visit.

Back to Alison:

Dad's had a number of visitors in the past two weeks: the Wolfs from our ward--Sheldon was Dad's home teacher for many years; his nephew Laurie (Skip) Craig; his great-nephew David James and his wife and little son; lots of family members. Dad's also had numerous cards and letters from family and friends. If you visit Dad, please remember to sign the log, so we know who's come by--Dad won't be able to remember even though he'll enjoy your visit while you're there.

Tonight when I visited Dad, I reached my brother Alan in the Washington, D.C. area on my cell phone and then my sister Christie in Pittsburgh, so Dad was able to talk on the phone with them for a bit. I took my grandson, Jeffrey, out into the hall during most of the phone calls--the center has a cat, birds, fish, and a dog, and Jeffrey thinks they're fascinating! However, I did overhear Dad telling Alan that he was doing as well as could be expected for being in the hospital--probably a good way for Dad to think about where he is. He told Christie that they mostly ignore him there--not true, but he may feel that way after having a person available to him 24/7 at home.

My friend Barbara, Dad's nurse, told me she was pleased with how Dad seemed when she saw him on Saturday. She said he had a pillow under his ankles just like we had at home and that his heels looked "white as the driven snow"--it's easy for a person's heels to reddden and get bedsores if their heels are flat on the bed. She found one cup of unthickened liquid on his bedside table--he's supposed to only have thickened liquids. When she reported the problem to the nurse, they realized someone new hadn't known to give Dad only thickened liquids, and promised to make sure she knew from now on. Overall, she was very impressed with the care he's getting at the care facility.

We're grateful for your interest in Dad. We're especially aware of the great gift of family at this time of year, and wish you a joyful and happy time as we celebrate Christ's birth.